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KeithSpeak - January 2010




January 1, 2010 

I've decided to buckle in and go for a rocket ride in 2010. But before I take off, I just want you guys to know that even if I happen to make 100 million dollars and become the inaugural Interstellar Man of the Year (which is a nifty new award I'm thinking of establishing), I won't forget all the little people, you know, the ones who did, um, whatever it is they did, whose names I can't quite recall, wherever they are, for now and for always! Air kisses! Feel the love! Ok, then.


January 2, 2010

Susan had about a million mixed tapes when I met her way back when and over the following years I proceeded to make about a million more. So, with millions of tapes sitting around and not listened to much, I began pawing through them to see what we were missing. Cripes, such great music! It was embarrassing. I had but one thought, Need-to-digitize, so I jumped on the Internet to find out how to hook up our dubbing deck to the computer so I could turn the tape tracks into MP3s. A $7.35 Radio Shack cable later, a quick download of a good freeware sound editor and wallah, digital files of some of the most seminal music of our lives. Cool.


January 3, 2010

This might be something a lot of you haven't thought about, but if you were on another planet and you handed someone there a $100 bill, don't be surprised if they look at you like - What a silly Earth person! See, what they don't tell you is that in outer space, our money is no good. To them it's just a piece of paper with ink on it. You can't buy stuff with it. And a debit card? Forget it. So, if you are planning on travelling intergalactically in 2010, think of another way to pay for what you want out there, because the phrase, Your money's no good here, has never been more applicable. I'm just here to help.


January 4, 2010

Light, shadow, color - all infuse our lives.


 Still, we can filter what we want to see.


But even so, a wave is still a wave. Everything is in the eye of the beholder.


January 5, 2010

All right, I've read about my year to come from a slew of Internet astrologers who claim they're never wrong, and they all pretty much say what I was going to do anyway. Which is launch a rocket and see how far off the ground it gets. In other words, for me, the horoscopes pointed to the reality of there being a huge amount of work to come, so I'd better be prepared to do it, because if I don't, my rocket could blow up on the launching pad, and if I happen to be riding it at the time, strapped to it so to speak, well, it would not be something to my advantage. Blowing up. That's what they said, more or less. Heck, sounds good to me. I've always bet on myself. I'm quite comfortable with all or nothing.


January 6, 2010

Ok, perhaps I was too obtuse, or it wasn't a "getable" metaphor, or something else missed because a bunch of you wrote and asked if I'm literally going to build and launch a rocket. Though I am a scientist, and a damn good one, I don't know squat about rockets - EXCEPT what they look like launching, which was the comparison, see... I merely meant that I was going to do something this year, launch something, that may well take off like a rocket in terms of popularity. But sadly, like a joke, if you have to explain it...


January 7, 2010

Our place, 7:47 this morning.



January 8, 2010

I got this choice e-mail, obviously sent to the wrong site:


            Dear Madge Know It All,

                        That Russell Brand is such a slut! A real dirty boy. But I want him anyway. Does that make me a bad person? 


Good or Bad, You Decide


Well, since Madge Know It All will not get a crack at this, it's only fitting that I do:


            Dear Good or Bad, You Decide,

            In paying homage to Russell's sluttiness, I pronounce you good, but only for a little while. You could turn bad, very bad. See, Russell is now engaged, and after his betrothal, should you still desire him so, should you talk in public of your attraction to his dirty boy ways, well then that would cast you in the light of a home wrecker and temptress, and should you try and live out your fantasy Russell desires, delusional to boot. Still, maybe that's a good thing in your book, I dunno. Did that make sense? 


January 9, 2010

Got up early and pulled back the curtains in my office to find two does standing outside the window looking back at me. We were only five feet apart, separated by the window. One swished her tail. All three of us kept staring at each other. It was obvious I was intruding, so I backed away to my desk and was soon involved in work. Damn nice start to my day though.

January 10, 2010

You know what nature is? The recognition that you are just one living thing on a planet that is alive itself.

January 11, 2010

I've a new ringtone. I cut out a custom piece of Benny Goodman's Sing Sing Sing from his famous 1938 Carnegie Hall concert. In this bit there is a driving Gene Krupa tom tom drum beat pounding the back end while Benny plays a clarinet solo in which he hits C above high C. Ooh. Snip snip, my new ringtone.


January 12, 2010


Two heads and two sets of arms made Barbara and Fiona Katzman unique. Found wandering in a field by Swedish twins promoter Magnus Von Verson, the gals were all the rage at the Stockholm Twins Contest, and would have won if not disqualified by the judges as having "biologically cheated" during the talent portion of the Contest. Head judge Per Lundquist explained, "They're two people in one body for christsakes! Their circuits are all goobered up making them capable of super fast whirling movements, placing all the other twins, none of whom are attached, at a distinct disadvantage whirling-wise. We are Swedish. We are fair. So we booted them." Strangely, no one has seen the girls or Magnus Von Verson since. It has been speculated in the Swedish tabloids that they are trying to make a three headed baby that the Frankfurt Triplet Contest absolutely won't be able to deny! But no one knows for sure.


January 13, 2010

The quality of your life is self-defining and completely subjective. That means that you are the only arbiter of whether yours is high or low, great or crummy. For instance, commonly lusted after items such as money, fancy cars, a huge house, prestigious job - all of that means very little to me personally and adds virtually no value to my quality of life. However, where I live, who I live with, what I do for my work and enjoyment (which for me are one and the same), these are the types of things that spawn my self-assessed off the charts quality of life. Those with a high quality of life will be those who have thought about what that means to them, and then pursued that. The rest will live a life reflective of not having thought about it at all.


January 14, 2010

Our place, 7:47 this morning.

I live in the interior of British Columbia, Canada and we've had virtually no snow this Winter. It's the middle of January and the ground is completely bare, the temperature is 40F and it is currently raining. This is just wrong. I don't need a climate scientist or talking head politician to tell me what I know to be true. This is not right.


January 15, 2010

If you were a child prodigy, but you are no longer a child, are you still a prodigy? Are geniuses geniuses for their whole life? Or is there a creative window in which their powers of genius are the greatest and their creations at their most sublime? And after that they just become regular people. Ex-geniuses. Still smart, sure, but just average. And if their creations during their heyday didn't set the world on fire, will they be seen as having wasted their genius? 'Cause if so, now they are just regular people with wasted lives. Brutal, eh?


January 16, 2010

Early morning, ground fog everywhere, coyotes yipping in the woods to the north, an unseen wing of geese flying overhead and honking loudly, our three malamutes in the front yard howling back at the coyotes, and me in my bathrobe, cup of hot coffee in hand, listening to this all natural cacophony, just hugging myself over its noisy wonderfulness.


January 17, 2010

This guy was so happy. Happy like he won the lottery happy. Giddy, dancing, loudly singing, "We are the champions....OF THE WORLD!". And for what? This man who lives for tech, has a very common name, John Smith common, and he just secured his domain name in .com because the previous domain name holder let it lapse. The happy guy had been cyber squatting the renewals for 17 years and finally, finally! he snagged it before the other same named person renewed it. His joy was genuine and he was as excited as I have ever seen him, even though this was the first time I ever met him, and actually, I didn't even meet him, I just got to watch his reaction as he ran through the office like a lunatic singing Queen. But I was in the right place at the right time to witness it. I must have known I would be amused.


January 18, 2010


Nobody in their right mind could possibly believe that Santa makes all that stuff he gives away. Elves - get real! In fact, he nicks it off the backs of trucks to fulfill all the wishes of the greedy, thoughtless children in the world who demand so much of him. The man's a saint all right. Of course, he's had more than a thousand arrests in December alone, but he always seems to get bailed out just in time to deliver his stolen goods. By the way, that's how he got his name, St. Nick. True story. Is too.

January 19, 2010

I watch a news interview of some hoary old politician on one of the committees trying to alter Net Neutrality in favor of the telco corporate line about how tiered service would be good for everyone, and how dangerous an open and free Internet is, blah blah, and it's easy to see that this guy doesn't use the Internet. Never has. Because those that use the Internet see unfiltered, unfettered Internet access as a public utility. Those who don't use the Internet, sell their vote through greed and ignorance and disservice to those who put them where they are, and then have the temerity to tell us that something they know nothing about - and we already possess - isn't good for us. Remind me again why this is put up with?

January 20, 2010

I was watching a video clip of a livid, vigorous, Teddy Roosevelt screaming and yelling at a bunch of people in a room. He was ruddy faced and had spittle at the corner of his mouth and he kept pounding the table for effect, and I was thinking, at this moment, if somebody suggested that maybe Teddy might want to look into an anger management course, he would have killed them with his bare hands, right there, in front of everybody, and then asked the rest, Anyone else think I need anger management? Maybe Obama needs a little of that? I'm just sayin'...


January 21, 2010

I read this nice, heartfelt article written by an Atlanta man who, along with his family, did something that was powerful and meaningful and sincere. It was well thought out and researched and the results aided many other people in a positive, life changing manner. It was neat to see a practical example of people living by their convictions. I finish the article and start reading the comments and one after one they're full of typical Internet self-absorbed rubbish - Why didn't he do this; What they did is against my religion; He helped foreigners, he's not a patriot; They're mocking the American Dream; I'm a vet, they should have given me that money, etc. It was disgusting actually. Look, I understand the need to tell others your point of view (I do it here every day), but that article was not about them, never was.


January 22, 2010

Even though we're having no Winter to speak of, for some it's in full ugly force. For those beleaguered folks, we offer up this picture of relaxation fit enough for a mid-Winter flight of fantasy. Enjoy.



January 23, 2010

Should have done this a long time ago. Downloaded a piece of freeware that allows one to remotely take over someone else's computer so you can help them fix a problem or teach them how to do something on their system instead of trying to talk them through it on the phone.  Sound familiar? If you are the go to computer person for friends or relatives, this is a splendid way to help them without having to be there. That has value, my friends.

January 24, 2010

Did you know that you can go underwater in Google Earth? 


January 25, 2010 


Smiling, self-assured and dressed to kill, the Inglett sisters were ready to take the world by storm. Joey, the fellow who owned the automobile behind them and often took their picture on sunny days posed in front of it, told them that their success was assured, undeniable and presaged, though neither Joey nor the girls had a clue about what they were talented at besides posing in front of Joey's car, arms linked, Inglett sisters forever.


January 26, 2010

You know how when things are going really well you will start doubting how long it will last and start waiting for the other shoe to drop? Conversely, when everything is going horribly wrong, do you say that it won't last and you are waiting for the other shoe (of good fortune) to drop? Hardly. Well why not?


January 27, 2010

Something will be happening in our town this morning that will likely never happen again. The Olympic Torch Relay is coming through Salmon Arm. It will have travelled 1,000 kilometers by water, 18,000 kilometers by air, 26,000 kilometers on land and have passed through over a 1,000 Canadian communities before it reaches here and goes jogging by in the hand of my friend Roy. At 45,000km, it will be the longest domestic Torch Relay in Olympic history. There are 16 days until the Opening Ceremonies of the Vancouver Winter Olympics, when billions of Earthlings will watch someone take that same torch and light up the British Columbia night sky. Frankly people, I am starting to get excited out of my shorts.


January 28, 2010

So the first month of the year is almost over. I'm good with that. The month had merit, interest, and relaxation too. It went by fast enough, but not in a blur. Actually, I found it accommodating on many fronts. And though there are a few days left to clean up, you know, 29, 30 and so on, I believe none of them could possibly be calamitous enough to overturn my thoughts of January having been a very nice start to an industrious year. Here's hoping yours was as good.


January 29, 2010

You know you're at a special moment in time when in the same fir tree you see an eagle, an owl and a raven all within close proximity of each other. These three bird species are not what you would call best of avian friends and usually, if you see them together at all, it is one attacking the other, or the other, but not ever really hanging out within three meters of one another in the same tree. I wonder if it's some kind of peace negotiations or territory discussion?  


January 30, 2010

Sometimes one January mid-Winter flight of fantasy is not enough. You know? Enjoy.



January 31, 2010

This day has been structured to within an inch of its life and this is all the time that has been allotted for this. Cruel perhaps, but true. Later, my pretties.




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KeithSpeak                                  February 2010 


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