Header Graphic
KeithSpeak- February 2018


February 1, 2018
Out of the blue, someone I knew decades ago got back in touch. I was immediately wary because back when I knew him, he was a hustler. Now he calls after 25 years? We chat, I'm just waiting for the come on, when he tells me that nowadays he's an elected politician. I said, So you're still hustling. He laughed. I smiled. If I were a religious man, I would pray for his constituents. A wolf in sheep's clothing 'bout covers it.
February 2, 2018
A famous actress I had once written for gets in touch. She is currently filming in Vancouver and wanted to discuss a new project. She asked when I could get down there. I told her it was the worst possible time for me. How about Skype? With her tight shooting schedule, she rang me up from the set, in costume, where I found myself face to face with a fully made up zombie. It was horrible. I couldn't focus, she looked so gruesome, so...dead. Her eyes were soulless black marbles, her teeth were worn away from gnawing on flesh and bone and the rags she had on were filthy but very revealing, which also made it hard to focus. This wasn't working. In the background, someone yelled, "I need more brains! This bowl is only half full! Come onnn, people! Five minutes! Places!" She said she had to go and that we would talk later. Whew, I thought to myself.
February 4, 2018
Rose decided that she hated her name and on her 14th birthday demanded that everybody call her Serifina. But her mother said that was silly and kept calling her Rose, and her father continued to use his pet name, Princess, and her friends just kept using Ro, and her teachers refused to call her anything but her official name. But this is the modern world, where everybody is somebody else online; where analog Rose can become digital Serifina, just. like. that. Ah, technology.
February 6, 2018
I read this story about a guy who admits to a cold case crime on his social media page. Somehow, from there it blows up. How can one unknown, unfollowed social media idiot confess to a decades old crime and the police find out about it, arrest him, and it becomes a news story I read about the following morning? He's one guy out of billions mouthing off on social media. Are these platforms just populated with little bitch snitches looking high and low?
February 7, 2018
The Korean Olympics are here! Multiple events are starting today before the opening ceremonies - mixed curling, ice skating, hockey, oh boy! Of course this means that I will be posting sporadically over the next two weeks. Sports galore await! Later, my pretties.
February 12, 2018
As always, the Olympics are proving to be a fount of interesting stories, resilient athletes, patriotic pride and raw emotion; the good stuff that makes the Olympics the Olympics. How good? To get me to sit on my couch at 3 in the morning, to watch people I don't even know doing feats I couldn't even imagine, to find myself so invested that occasionally I'll jump off the couch or yell at the TV, and will do this for 16 hours straight, for 16 days, well, that's a pretty good trick. A pretty good trick indeed.
February 17, 2018
We are now half way through the Olympics. Canada is doing well and our athletes have made this winter nation proud. I've been wondering, if they have horses in the Summer games, why can't dog sledding be a Winter sport? What could be more wintry than Huskies and Malamutes in the snow?
February 20, 2018
Canadians Scott Moir and Tessa Virtue are pure sex on ice. Don't believe me? Watch this:
February 25, 2018
The Games are over. Bravo Pyeongchang! Every time the Olympics come to a close there is really only one way to describe them: they are the Greatest Show On Earth. Personally, though I didn't win any medals, I won just by watching. Korea, you should be very proud indeed.
February 26, 2018
Is America broken or what? Ignoramus Trump, guns, endless wars, the rich getting richer at the expense of everyone else, environmental disregard, decapitating healthcare for millions, the xenophobic removal of immigrants, isolationism, protectionism, disregard for anybody but the rich, white self-serving chumps perpetuating this twisted version of an American pogrom... gak.

Return to KeithSpeak or go forward to next month
KeithSpeak                                           March 2018


Keith Ryan Publishing


Privacy policy

Copyright © 2024 keithryan.com
All Rights Reserved.