July 4, 2025
Big Ernie was out for revenge after he saw Darla at Gator's party sweet talking Gator. He sidled closer to hear what they were saying.
-- Aw, I like Big Ernie well enough but...
-- But what, Darla?
-- Well, sometimes he seems, I dunno, kinda stupid to me, you know?
-- Yeah, he can be like that.
-- And sometimes I just want, I dunno, more of a man, or, just a different one, you know?
-- Now you're talking 'bout what I wanna hear.
-- Am I, Gator?
-- Definitely. Ernie's a bum. I'll tell you that.
-- Would you fight Big Ernie for me?
-- I'll knock his ass out for you. Yer looking so fine, Darla.
-- Am I?
-- Let's go out to my truck.
Big Ernie had heard enough. He stepped out from behind the curtain, but they were gone. He knew Darla would have to pee first so he hurried out to the rendezvous truck and squeezed himself into the crew cab back seat. When Darla and Gator showed up and started making out he commenced his revenge. It brought an end to Gator's party and life, but it brought Darla and Big Ernie closer than ever. To this day, historians argue over whether it was true love or just plain testosterone.
