KeithSpeak- February 2014

 

 
 
 
February 1, 2014
If you ask any astrophysicist, cosmologist or regular joe science professor if there is a high probability of intelligent life on other planets, they will say yes. But those same people go all hands off about possible UFO visitations on this planet. That's not "real" science, they say. Now why is that? If you agree there is most likely life elsewhere in the universe, why would them visiting Earth be such a stretch? Why would Earth visitation by another life form be a verboten subject for "real" scientists, as it obviously is. That's just, I dunno, stupid.
 
February 2, 2014
This tourist from Washington was at a gas station filling his car, as I was mine. He had on a Russell Wilson Seahawks no. 3 signed jersey. Actually, the jersey had signatures all over it. When I looked closer to see some of the names, it was obvious they were all written in the same handwriting with the same pen. It appeared that this guy had signed his own jersey with all the names of the Seattle players. Huh...
 
February 3, 2014
I've just come across moose tracks on the edge of our property. Rural living at its finest.
 
February 4, 2014
Some of you are very confused about this life and feel utterly powerless within it. Look, every day you are faced with choices. You make decisions based on what you think is right and on what you believe to be true. Once a choice is made and a route followed, you will then face more choices that will lead to even more choices. In other words, you get to decide what you're doing with your life over and over and over again. You can blame others or hate the institutions behind them, but the fact of the matter is, you made choices to be where you are and where you're going. It's all up to you. It always has been. That's your power. Seize it and direct your life.
 
February 5, 2014
I've an acquaintance who lives in the deep south who believes he's poor because he's been kept down by 'the man', but he also acknowledges that he "can't really do much of anything anyhow so how hireable is that really?" He says he spends his considerable idle time thinking about the world and his place in it. When asked for a summation, he replied, "I've come to the conclusion that personal development is a piss poor substitute for cold hard cash."
 
February 6, 2014
The Sochi Olympics are here! They start live at 3 AM and I will be up and present daily over the next couple of weeks. This means I will be posting here sporadically as I spend 18 hours a day on my couch watching the Games. My dedication and focus will be as strong as any of the athletes and if the truth be told, we're almost exactly the same, the only difference being they win medals and perform in front of millions while I am by myself surrounded by junk food and beer, representing no one. (Wait a sec, while I open this bag of chips.) Ok, let the Games begin!
 
February 10, 2014
Well, I've been staying up all night and sleeping during the day. Very vampireish. All that's left is to acquire a taste for blood and change my name to Vlad. They say the Olympics can be a life changing event, but who knew they meant this?
 
February 12, 2014
At first, Marvin couldn't figure out why the new car wash place was so darned cheap. 
naotakem    
Then he found out.
 
February 15, 2014
I caught this clueless politician's rant on his hatred of gays and the poor. His diatribe was so baseless that I had to look up this clown's accomplishments to see why he was such an authority on the "right" way to live a life. Basically, this tool inherited his family's money and hatred. Why chumps like this have such onerous convictions about the lives of others is beyond me.
 
February 17, 2014
Overheard a couple of kids at the grocery.
-- Did not!
-- I saw you swipe it!
-- Did not.
-- Open your jacket.
-- No.
-- Open it.
-- Get your hands offa me.
-- I'm telling Mom.
-- You better not say anything.
-- Then give me some.
-- Ok.
 
February 19, 2014
Saw a 60 pound child walking a 100 pound dog on a leash. Her mother was half a block behind pushing a stroller. Though the kid and dog looked kind of cute, like a Norman Rockwell painting, the arrangement was pure window dressing. The child had no control; it was the dog's decision as to what would happen next.
 
February 20, 2014    
This is so infuriating!
Wheelchair users can't be tortured?! It's 2014, when are we going to have equal rights for all people?! 
 
February 22, 2014
My message for everyone out there? Wake up. Just wake the hell up. If you don't know what I mean by that, sweet dreams.
 
February 23, 2014
The Sochi Olympics are over. They were better than advertised and delivered in full. Thanks to all the athletes, the CBC and Russia for keeping me entertained for two and a half weeks. Whoo hoo. Bravo Россия.
 
February 24, 2014
I'm following a car on a dirt road when the guy rolls down his window and throws out a big bag of garbage, which breaks when it hits the ground and spews trash all across the road. What a pig. I can see he has another trash bag ready to chuck out the window, only he does it on a curve, right into the front of a dump truck which hits the bag and blows it everywhere. Because the dump truck was in the middle of the road, the litterer has run into the soft mud on the side and is stuck. The dump truck driver gets out, assesses the damage to his vehicle, walks over to the stuck car, says something to the guy, and then proceeds to repeatedly kick the quarter panel and driver's side door denting the snot out of the car. He then cleaned all the crap off the front of his truck and drove away. Karma? Just desserts? Or simply, ignorant fool gets pwnd?
 
February 25, 2014
Here are 3 things, keys to the game if you like, that can vastly improve your life experience:
1.) Do what you want to do, do what you love, do what needs to be done, but don't hate what you do. Do not make a life out of something you hate.
2.) Examine what you believe to be true. Know thyself.
3.) Realize that you are all powerful. You can do whatever you want. You make your own decisions. You run your own life. In the end, you are what you've made of yourself.
 
February 26, 2014  
Alphonse Bigelow was a machine therapist. Whenever industrialists had vexing problems with machinery that either their millwrights or engineers couldn't handle, Alphonse was called in. In one hour sessions every Monday, Wednesday and Friday, he would probe and analyze the machine's inner being, the ghost within, as Alphonse would say. "Sometimes it's necessary to regress the bloody thing all the way back to its component parts! Can you imagine? I'm talking to screws and bolts! It's crazy." When asked why he wore a fez to his therapy appointments, Alphonse replied, "The machines seem to like it."
 
February 27, 2014
Did you read about that California couple who found 5 cans of buried coins worth millions in their back yard? Or what about the farmer in Sweden who dug up a 200 pound meteorite in his field and sold it for 3 million dollars? How about the guy diving off his dock in the Florida keys who discovered a 300 year old pearl necklace worth 1.5 million? My point? Anyone who says you can't get rich quick is fibbing.
 
February 28, 2014
Dude kept talking money metrics and economic theory and wealth accumulation until I glazed over like the frosting on a cake but he continued and continued until I finally stopped him and said, Enough. I could have followed that with the G.K. Chesterton quote: To be clever enough to get all the money, one must be stupid enough to want it. But I didn't. I didn't follow it with anything except my retreat.
 
 

 
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